The Paradox of Love

I was searching for a feeling, you were searching for me.
–The Tow’rs

Jesus once said, to find your life you must lose it. I have never felt so beautifully lost. I think the life we are meant to lose is that ugly selfish version of ourselves, still under the yoke of slavery to sin. Drowned in the waters of baptism, we lose our worst selves (Romans 6).

But nothing is good simply because of the absence of wickedness. No, we live a continual life of becoming (Philippians 3:13-15). We never fully arrive at the goodness God that originally created for us. Even so, we are new, like butterfly bursting from cocoons, a metamorphosis of epic proportions (2 Corinthians 5:17).

Again, I have never felt so beautifully lost like today. Surrounded by only the best, the kinds of people who witness to the resurrection just by breathing. I thank God for my house church, my real family. I thank God for all the ministry opportunities and patience from Water’s Edge. I thank God for friends crazy enough to think that the most wicked and dark apartment complex in DFW can be reached with Gospel over a pint of beer (Michael and Chris, you remain my heroes. You each have sacrificed for the Kingdom more than I can ever imagine). I thank God for couples that mirror the love that Christ has for His church (Amy & Adam, John & Katie, Kimberly & Chris, Karl & Ashley, Jessica & Eric, CJ & Shauna). I praise God for my sister who remains the symbol of selfless service. I daily count my blessings for every extra second I get with my grandpa whose legacy of faith and generosity will echo into eternity. 

Finally, I am thankful for the wife of my youth, my sweetie. Words will fail describe how much you mean to me. Your patience and understanding remain steadfast. You are always for me, never against me, always my teammate, never an enemy. You make me want to be a better man, driving me to be the human God created me to be in every vocation God has for me, in life and family, in work and play. I love you. Forgive me when I was searching for a feeling, when all you wanted was me.

My prayer for the world is that we lose ourselves in Jesus so that we might also be found in Him. My prayer is that every prodigal son or daughter would find their heavenly Father. Amen.